Tribute to Joey

~ By Robert Mudde ~

I got to know Joey well in grade 7 and 8 at Wired because he was nearly always the last teen picked up. I had an agreement with his parents that he would stay an extra thirty minutes after youth to accommodate their busy schedule. My favorite memories of Joey came during those thirty minutes. It was thirty minutes of random made up games by Joey.

There was; "How Far Can You Throw a Coat Hanger Across the Parking Lot.", "How Many Walls Can You Bounce a Pop Bottle Off In One Throw.", "I Betcha I Can Keep My Hand On This Heater Longer Then You.", "Let's See How Long We Can Lock Sasha Outside In the Cold.", and "Turn Around and Catch It."

"Turn Around and Catch It" was one of Joey's favorites. You basically threw any random object you could find at the other person while they had their back to you, and then told him to "turn" only once the object was in flight. The goal was then to catch the object, with bonus points rewarded if it was a particularly difficult object to catch. I got bonus points one night for catching a folding chair. Joey got a lecture. I gave Joey bonus points one night for catching a football. Not that it was hard to catch, just I yelled "turn" too late and it hit him in the face giving him a fat lip. Joey gave me a lecture.

Two years ago Joey went through a hugging phase. He would run up to you and give you a hug for no reason, at least three times a night too. "I'm just a hugger" he would say. One night, he got it in his head (much to the disapproval of the other guys) to hug everyone in his small group. Grade 8 boys don't like to be hugged, especially by another grade 8 boy so don't judge my supervision skills when I tell you that the resistance he faced was huge. He got shoved away, called inappropriate names, and one particular boy even knocked him off his feet with a swinging elbow after a failed hugging attempt.

It seemed to take him by surprise, and I thought it was a lesson learned. The feeling of rejection, and the embarrassment from being knocked flat would have been more than enough of a deterrent for me. But not Joey. At the end of Youth, I watched as Joey creeped up behind this same failed hug recipient in the parking lot. In a flash he got him from behind with a giant bear hug. And then just as quick he was booking it off across the parking lot with the angry bear hug recipient close behind.

"He's recovering from cancer," I yelled trying to divert the beat down Joey seemed about to get. Neither heard, Joey's panted giggling and their footsteps was all that could be heard as they disappeared around the church. It took Joey a full lap to shake his pursuer and by then he was obviously out of breath. "What were you thinking Joey?" I asked. With a shoulder shrug and a grin he answered, "I'm a hugger".

What Joey taught our youth group here at CrossRoads, is that there's a lot of life to be had all around us. And that pain or fear isn't a good enough reason for us to avoid living that life. As cancer appeared again in Joey's body, we again observed the same lesson. Cancer came with its pain and with its fears, and yet Joey didn't seem to let it get in the way of him finding life around him. That's hard to do, but I think Joey cheated. He had God's help too.

In Jr. High Youth we want to be more like Joey. So often our fear of rejection, embarrassment, and pain keeps us from grabbing on to life. From making friends, from trying new things, from being who we really are, or even from having tough or meaningful conversations. If Joey could find life around him even with cancer, then with God's help so can we.

And Sasha and Chantelle, don't think you’re off the hook. I know at least half of the trouble Joey got into was a result of the laugh track that you two provided him with.

Joey, I will miss you.

Joey, this Youth Group will miss you, too.